Sunday night, coming down off my "market' high from earlier that morning, I decided to procrastinate and not study for exams. Instead I made an attempt to pack my bags. With each article of clothing, a memory of my time abroad flooded back, making packing all the more painful and frustrating. The jeans I arrived in, the shirt I wore in Dublin, the dress I bought in Portugal, the blouse I sweat a gallon of liquid in at my first real nightclub in London. How could I possibly pack all the memories and take them home with me? Especially when I was still ready to make so many more. I thought about what I would do when I got home, and all I saw was a blurry haze of work, GRE test prep, endless emails and phone calls, and cleaning my bathroom. The real world was slowly creeping back into my mind from the deep, dark cave I had banished it to on January 6th, and it looked more horrifying than I remembered. But what about my friends, my flat mates, the crazy group of people who had become my brothers, sisters, lovers?
Who will I drunkenly rave about Alexander Skarsgard with if Pa isn't there? Would I ever tell ridiculously stupid jokes with Jamie again? Would I ever walk out my door to find Pa Nhia waiting in line for the bathroom in the morning? Who will I turn to for fashion inspiration without LC around? Will anyone ever be able to sleep with as many random items on their bed as Anna does? Who will entertain me with drunken sassy-ness when Lizzie isn't around? Who will take care of me when I'm obviously incapacitated on the tube if Amanda doesn't? If Katie L isn't there, who will bitch about GRE's and LSAT's? Whose cute love life can I creep on without Sara and Ben? Will I ever hear Max say words like "rage" and "clutch" again? Who will give me searingly sarcastic glares without Paige around? Who will make me laugh when John isn't around? Which one-day-celebrity will I hang out with if Karl isn't around? Will Brandon and I ever continue our debate about medical research on animals, and still be friends afterwords? Will I hear Matt Byers chant Hebrew again? Who else could understand the true meaning of "struggle bus" other than Brian? Who will be my ridiculously handsome gay friend without Sam? Who will invite me to killer coastie parties and wear designer sunglasses endlessly without Stavis around? Who will accompany me to killer coastie parties if Kovas is busy? Who will be down to have a great time with me, not matter what we do, if Katie T isn't there? Will I ever again hear the sound of Lauren's happy and contagious laugh coming from 2A? If Sean isn't there, who will make sure I get home from Camden music (excuse me, booze) tours? Where would I be without Ethan's witty film-buff comments and sarcastic remarks? Who will I borrow the best hair curler ever from if not Clare? Who else will I always find in pajamas if not Noel? Who will listen to all my crazy stories and still like me if Mandy isn't there? If Leigh isn't around, who will lay down the law and still look classy doing it? Who would have eaten a second dinner with me if Alyssa wasn't around? Who could I always turn to for a smile without Carolyn? Who can I count on for an interesting conversation if not Casey? Who will make my hand so tired from writing if Alaura doesn't give incredibly informative presentations in History of London? Who else will be the resident couple if Abbey and Chris don't live with me? If I don't see Stephanie, who will make me feel like I need to burn my entire wardrobe and start over? Who else will admit they're too out of shape to run 10 blocks to War Horse if not Sam G? When party planning, who will come up with hilarious teenage games to play if Allie T isn't around? Whose incredibly cute J Crew clothes will I admire if Ariel isn't with me? Who will battle creeper pics with me if not Katharine? Who will I talk dirty about boys with if Isabel isn't there? Who can I count on to look classy at theater performances and wear my high heels when my feet hurt if not Matt Apel? Who else will share my love of models and my favorite movie if not for Sarah S? Will I ever slip into the kitchen for a late night snack and convene with my gossip council again? Will I ever dodge piles of dog poop while walking down Gloucester, terrorized by bratty children on scooters and ruthless posh moms with strollers? Will I be able to go to Spain for a weekend trip, or visit Paris with the person I love most in the world? Will I ever have fun again?
What about my professors? Would I ever fear the questions of Mark Wheatley in screenwriting, so hung over I couldn't open my mouth for fear of vomiting? Would I ever watch John Makey chain smoke on a walking tour, or hear him make a sly comment regarding sex? What about Josh and Mary? Would I ever go into Josh's office, intending to quickly sign up for a pound trip, but stay for 15 minutes gushing about Barcelona with him? Would Mary ever give another one of her famous lectures about cabs, weed, or "the washing up"? Would I ever hear Justin use the word "visceral" or talk about the Clash again? And what will I do without Steven, most beloved of the UW London Spring Semester professors, with his constant encouragement, his vivacious smile, vibrant sunglasses and down to earth personality? What will I do on Wednesday afternoons at 4:25? A POWER LECTURE? NOOOOOOOO!
Suddenly, screams erupted from the kitchen, echoing down the hallway with a menacing tone. I ran to find Leigh and Jamie squealing as Pa pulled something out of the cabinet with a dish towel. At first I couldn't tell what it was, and then the realization, and the smell, hit me. It was an entire loaf of bread, completely fuzzy green with mold, rotting in an open plastic bag. It smelled like a rat had eaten a feast of carbs and subsequently died. Screaming along with the crowd that had come to witness the spectacle, I had another thought. That bread could be my time here in London. Let a good thing go for too long and it starts to get moldy. All good things have an expiration date, and just like the food in London, it always seems too soon. It's probably best I'm leaving London on high note, so that in my mind it will always remain my London, the London I knew and loved. The London I spent way too much money in. The London the best semester of my life was spent in. The London that let me embrace her, and the London that I made my own.
Adieu, London. Adieu!
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